Tamir's critique of treating cutting people out of your life as progress. Bypassing the conversation to protect yourself is avoidance, not growth; it's fine to cut someone off after they've had their day in court, not to 'execute someone willy-nilly'.
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People think they're making progress in their life because they're cutting people out of their life. This is not progress. This is the equivalent of Joe Pesci digging a hole in the desert and putting a body in there.
When you're angry you don't have to think, and you don't have to admit fault. The self-righteousness is an easy exit off the highway: you're a dick, so I don't have to deal with you, goodbye.
- Avoidance compounds with life's stakes
Cutting and running might work at 20, but once there's a marriage, kids and a career the consequences grow; if you don't face the music now, you'll face it later.
It's okay to cut people off after they've had their day in court. But it's another thing to go and just execute someone willy-nilly.