The facades and veneers people prefer over the bare truth.
Where it comes up 9
Within this theme 52
Concepts 14
- Self-help as veneer
Tamir argues that people obsessed with self-awareness books, courses and seminars can be more inauthentic than everyone else, because each one adds another veneer and another layer of…
- The Shadow
Jung's term for the disowned parts of us, usually formed in childhood when a need wasn't met; Ian equates it with Watts's 'devil' and argues suppressing it costs more energy than bringing…
- Grifter vs. True Believer
The question behind Troll: does a ranting online personality really believe it, or is he farming engagement? Logan imagined a provocateur who is completely neutral on the issues and uses…
- Life as Performance
Goffman's idea that in public we play roles and wear masks, knowing others do the same, and take them off at home. Logan argues the internet amplifies this and removes the backstage, so we…
- Self-Help as Gateway to Extremism
In Troll, a 4chan-style forum's ten guidelines begin with genuinely good advice (reject nihilism, persevere, quit porn) before moving to who 'our people' are and who the enemy is. Logan…
- Persona
From the cold-open clip: in classical drama the mask was also a megaphone, and 'persona' is Latin for 'that through which the sound passes'. To discover you are a phony through and through…
- Sad Clown
The trope, and real pattern, of the person who is always 'on' and lights up every room while suffering privately. It comes up through Dazai's clowning and the death of Robin Williams.
- Fake It Till You Make It
The performance of everything going perfectly in self-improvement and entrepreneur circles; Tamir says he values truth over it, and Tyler hears the same from customers in law and banking.
- Armor
The patterned version of yourself, a veil or shield of armor built up over years that you present to the world. Behind it is the real you: daydreams, curiosities, what truly makes you…
- Canadian Agreeableness
Grant's observation that Canadians pile on agreement and tacit approval, which he finds suspicious and insincere, as in creative writing workshops where only praise is welcome.
- Mental Ponzi scheme
Tamir's phrase, which Colin adopts, for hierarchies in religion, philosophy and self-awareness groups. Climbing them means hitting more checklists and keeping up more appearances, so the…
- Influencers
Colin says today's culture celebrates influencers who have 'absolutely no weight' beyond how to get more Botox, while people like Newton aren't talked about. They are his example of fame…
- Realism vs Pessimism
Tamir reframes Grant's 'pessimism' as realism: piercing facades and showing what is, when people prefer the truth with a mask on top.
- People pleasing
Tamir groups it with validation-seeking and approval-seeking as the opposite of authenticity: calibrating your words to suit the other person until only a mask comes out.
Books 5
- Troll
Logan's 2023 novel about Peter Riley, an aspiring actor who becomes the online provocateur and cult leader 'Petrol'. It's written as short, dated fragments (forum posts, lectures…
- No Longer Human
Dazai's quasi-memoir about a man who clowns, drinks and ends in a double suicide. Tamir likes it; Grant finds it too self-indulgent and without desire.
- The Flowers of Buffoonery
Dazai's novella about a man recovering in a sanatorium after a failed double suicide. Tamir notes it was written before No Longer Human yet works as its sequel and has a more hopeful tone.
- Masks (poem)
Short poem (from Falling Up) about two people with blue skin who each hide it, search their whole lives for another blue person, and pass right by each other. It is used to show what we…
- The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life
Goffman's 1956 book on the dramaturgical view of social life. Logan refers to it as the 'infamous book back in the '50s' about life as performance and masks. He does not name the title.
People 10
- Alan Watts
British-American popularizer of Eastern philosophy; Tamir cites his lecture on the court jester about taking life sincerely rather than seriously.
- Logan Macnair
Criminology professor at Douglas College and Simon Fraser University in Vancouver who researches radicalization, terrorism, extremism and extremist media strategy; author of the novel Troll…
- Franz Kafka
Tamir asks whether Kafka's absurdity parallels their talk of enigmas. Tyler describes Kafka as crippled by his father yet turning pain into art, a 'special species of happiness', and says…
- Osamu Dazai
Japanese novelist of No Longer Human and The Flowers of Buffoonery. For Grant he is the example of dwelling on pain until there is no desire left; Tamir defends the book's purposeful…
- Elizabeth Holmes
Colin calls her the antithesis of authenticity: she went around telling everyone how authentic she was, everyone believed in her, and she ended up with an 11-year prison sentence. Tamir…
- Erving Goffman
Canadian-American sociologist. Logan cites his 1950s argument that public life is a performance in which everyone wears masks and follows a script until they get home, and then asks what…
- Milo Yiannopoulos
Tamir sees him as the purest troll. He was one of the people Logan studied while writing Troll: an articulate, self-described provocateur 'playing the heel' who wanted to be the target of…
- Robin Williams
Logan's real-life example of the sad clown: always high-energy around people, a 'well-spring of joy', but a fairly sad man behind closed doors, which is why his death shocked people.
- Shel Silverstein
Logan answered the Kafka quote with Silverstein's poem 'Masks'. Tamir reads it on air.
- Vladimir Putin
Colin's example of 'pretentious nonsense': sitting at one end of a long table with his generals at the far end to project omnipotence.
Quotes 10
All they end up doing is adding one veneer to the next veneer, adding one layer of masquerading to the next layer of masquerading.
To discover that you are a phony through and through and through is to discover that you're a big act, that you're a game. And when you discover that, then you wake up to find out who's the player.
Have those masks become grafted to our face in such a way where removing them is not as easy as it used to be in a pre-connected world?
People don't like to necessarily see the truth. They like their version of the truth: the truth plus the mask that goes on top of the truth, and that's more palatable.
In a lot of ways it's amplified these things, but it also means that we're never really fully able to step away from the performance.
People hide their imperfections. Social media, you hide your imperfections. Authenticity is about showing your imperfections and continuing to be yourself despite your imperfections.
Those expectations are real. Those expectations have gravity and they carry weight, and it's difficult to conduct yourself without consideration of those expectations.
We've gone through many upgrades, and we're certainly in a new version of civilization OS. The question for me genuinely is: are these masks a feature or a bug in the system?
I was ashamed of myself when I realized life was a costume party and I attended with my real face.
The biggest problem is most legends are built on lies. It's somebody's fantasy of themselves that they promulgate.
Insights 4
- Fake it long enough and you pay
Clowning yourself for others from a place of pain, rather than natural humor, eventually reaches a precipice where something gives. Dazai's novella and the sad-clown pattern show the bill…
- Self-improvement hierarchies breed sophisticated fakes
The higher you climb any belief system's checklist hierarchy, the more you need to keep up appearances, so those at the top are often the most out of touch with who they are. It works like…
- The mask can be mistaken for the self
Kids who grow up online are sometimes taught that the mask they wear is their authentic self. When those lines blur, the result is the widespread confusion about identity and belonging we…
- Some masks are a service
A deliberately chosen mask that does no net harm and benefits you and others has its place, like a doctor's bedside manner or a pilot who doesn't joke about crashing. The danger starts when…
Stories 6
- Car music on dates
In his twenties Tamir always switched the car music to whatever the woman he was driving liked. An article made him ask why he was bending over backwards, and whether she might want to know…
- Gym influencer in London
At a London gym a man filming his muscles yelled at Colin for walking past his camera. Colin told him the gym is for everybody and he should film at home. Colin reads it as people feeling…
- Ian's Gollum shadow at a retreat
A year and a half earlier Ian noticed a grasping, needy energy with clients (over-following-up, feeling owed). At a retreat he traced it to an unmet childhood need, shaped it into a…
- Making a famous person out of nothing
For the film 'I Know You', Colin's team invented a character, walked him through the streets of Italy and made him famous, and were amazed by what they got away with. The idea came from a…
- Packaging costlier than the product
When Colin sourced products in China, some ended up with packaging that cost more than the product itself. He says nice curtains are fine, but with no structure behind them you're building…
- The fake rocket scientist
At a motivational event the speaker claimed he had once been a rocket scientist, and the crowd was in awe. Colin looked him up and found he was 'so full of crap'. His lesson: the people…
Films, music and art 1
- I Know You
A film Colin made almost ten years ago. They invented a character, walked him through the streets of Italy and made him famous out of nothing, to show how little substance fame needs. The…
Characters 1
- Peter Riley
Protagonist of Troll, known online as 'Petrol' (inflammatory fuel with 'troll' inside it). He is terrified of an ordinary nine-to-five life and stays neutral on the issues, farming outrage…
Organizations and movements 1
- Theranos
Elizabeth Holmes's blood-testing company, which was built on fabricated claims. Cited as fake authenticity that fooled investors.